Good Lord

Here’s something to make you feel old:  Zac Hanson, the youngest member of the group that brought us “Mmm Bop,” is a father.  His wife Kate gave birth to John Ira Shepherd Hanson on Tuesday.

It’s a twister! It’s a twister!

I’ve been pretty absent from the internets lately, due in large part to the tornado that swept through my area Sunday night. My family was really lucky: we are all alive and still have a house. But my cousin Carla lost her mother- and father-in-law and over 400 homes were destroyed. The clean-up effort has been big. Hopefully I’ll be back to posting regularly soon.

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Hmph

Interesting little article by some fella named Den.  It’s hard to tell if he’s being serious or not.  Either way, I’ve heard similar sentiments expressed by guys before.  They can all bite me and get over themselves.

American Idol Finale

Our contestants are dressed like they belong in a Wham! video and Seacrest welcomes us to the finale.  My mom and I are watching mostly to see Carrie Underwood sing and to see who wins.  The rest of this two-hour suckfest is going to be ridiculous, I’m sure.  I’d rather be re-reading Harry Potter (my summer project to celebrate being done with law school.)  Hey, Holly Robinson Peete is there!  What list celebrity is she?  D list?  M list?

We find out that there were over 97 million votes cast and one David received 56% and one received 44%.  Wow.  For a Final Vote, that’s not even close.  Archuleta won in a landslide, I’m sure of it.  We kick it to Fran Drescher in Kansas City, MO (which is being counted as David Cook’s hometown).  Mikaela (Fran) looks fabulous but still grates.  Archuleta’s hometown is hosted by Matt Rogers (marine guy) in Salt Lake City, Utah. 

American Idol: Crown His Ass Already

Sorry I missed last week, gang. I was whisked off to a job interview and didn’t really even have time to watch the show, let alone recap it. However, let me take a guess: David C rocked, David A closed his eyes and schmooped, and Syesha probably sounded beautiful but had not a prayer in the world of stopping the David-David juggernaut. How’d I do?

We start off with the “Let’s Get Ready to Rumble” guy doing the stupidest intro I’ve ever seen in the history of reality TV and that is saying something. Also, if we’re going to have a rumble with these two it had better be under the highway and involve Jerome Robbins somehow. All the Top 12 are in the audience. Kristy Lee Cook appears to have been attacked by a jungle cat of some kind. Luke Perry is there with his granddaughter.

Survivor: Go Cirie!

We get a 5-minute long recap of the entire season so far. Like somebody might be tuning in for the first time. Jonathan compared the favorites to the Red Sox, Amanda caught a shark, we have a gratuitous shot of Natalie and Alexis back in the beginning of the season when I’m fairly convinced they weren’t actually there, there were a bunch of injuries and we lost Jonathan who rocks, Amanda/Parv/Cirie had an alliance, Ozzy/Jason/Erik were Dumb, Dumber and Dumbest (I still cannot beat The 3 Musketards as far as names go), and now we have the Final Four of Cirie, Natalie, Amanda and Parvati. I’m rooting for Cirie because she’s been pretty bad-ass. She’s done all this sneaky shit but she’s gotten everybody else to actually *do* it. Natalie sucks balls because she thinks she’s bad-ass when she’s not. Amanda thinks she’s going to be seen as “loyal.” We’ll see. Parvati…annoyed me so much in her first season that I really cannot abide her winning this one even if she played a way better game this time.

Awwww!

Mary Poppins is on ABC Family tonight.  Awwww.  I watched this movie incessantly when I was little.  I had such a crush on Burt.  “When you’re with Mary Poppins, suddenly you’re in places you’ve never dreamed of.  And quick as you can say ‘Bob’s your uncle,’ the most unusual things begin to happen.”

Sad Boy

Does anybody think David Archuleta actually hates his life and wishes he could just be back home playing with legos? Me too.

Survivor: James is Usurped!

Back from Tribal, Amanda and Cirie are feeling pretty good after Alexis’s ouster.  Erik and Natalie are reeling.  In fact, Natalie is laying under a blanket with a doo-rag on while flies land on her head…she looks like a corpse.  Which is not that much different.

Erik interviews that at Tribal Amanda made him feel like a fool.  Well, WAIT TIL LATER BABY!  (Spoiler).  Natalie instructs Erik that if he wins reward he has to send her to Exile so she can look for the Idol.  They don’t trust anybody blahblahblah easily-dupedcakes.

American Idol: Jason or Syesha?

Here we go.  Is it Jason or Syesha?  I have a final tomorrow so…

Howie Mandel.  Ew.

Reelin’ in the Years by Steely Dan for Group Sing.  Weak.  And now with 30% more showchoir choreography.

David Archuleta is safe.  I am so shocked.